10 months home

It's been ten months since this little girl was placed in our arms!

She had her palate repair surgery this summer. Once she had her surgery, she wasn't afraid to eat. She eats anything and everything. She loves rice, noodles, raspberries, bananas, and so much more.

She will say a few words, like "mama" and "meow, meow".
She will sign more, drink, please, and thank you.
She really will only sign upon request, and when I ask her "What do you need?".
Squealing is her thing right now.

She is a smart, little girl. She is pulling the chairs over to the counter to reach what she wants (i.e. bread, someone else's drink, etc).

She is adventurous.
She lets her dad throw her up in the air, 3 feet or more, and catch her again and again.
She just giggles and giggles.

She loves the cats. She'll chase them around, and snuggle on them. Or, pull their tails. :)

She loves being outdoors. She likes playing on her little slide, and just running around with the kids.

She loves listening to music.
She loves watching Doc McStuffins.

We can't imagine life without her. She is so loved!!!

We love you Soph!

home

Thank you for your prayers!
We are home, and trying to settle into some sort of routine.

Sophie is doing as well as to be expected after a major surgery.
Although wouldn't you know, she is a little upset that she can't have food.
The girl who wouldn't eat anything but smoothies for months, now wants food.
It's smoothies for two weeks though.

It's a fight to get her to take her medicine, but we get it down.
It's not fun, but it's a must for pain control.

She's waking up a couple times a night.
This momma is tired.

She has done amazingly well compared to what Joe & I were expecting from her.
I pray that this continues for the next month.

Thank you again for your prayers. You are welcome to continue praying for complete healing, and to pray that this surgery is successful for her, and that we won't have to have any additional surgeries within the next year.

fear

This afternoon Sophie will have her palate repair surgery. This is a big surgery for her. One that could fail within the first few months. "That's a wide one," her surgeon stated. "She'll have a 50% success rate. It will take more than one surgery."

We know she'll possibly have another surgery when she's four or five, depending on her speech and language progress. Then another one when she's about 10. It's the unknown that's scary. How many more surgeries will she need to just repair the palate? Will she have to have several (like 7) like other children I've read about? Will she need another surgery this year? Or, will she only require one?

It's the unknown that makes me fearful. The unknown of so many variables.
The anesthesia, the pain control, the recovery, the liquid diet, and so much more.

"Hope is the only thing stronger than fear." -Hunger Games

Hope. I'm holding onto hope.

The hope of only one surgery to close her palate.
The hope that there will be no complications.
The hope that her speech will "take off".
The hope that closing her palate will mean less food issues.

The hope that tomorrow afternoon she will be her spunky little self.

Thank you for the prayers.
I will try to update sometime tomorrow.

surgery update

This little girl has eluded surgery again.

The week of surgery on Monday and Tuesday she had a slight fever (99 degrees) for about an hour in the afternoons after her nap. We called the doctor as instructed to do, and were told that it was probably allergies and they would more than likely proceed with surgery.

On Thursday morning, she awoke with a bumpy rash on her chest. Thursday afternoon while at the pre-appointments for surgery, the doctor looked at the rash, and said it was a viral rash. Surgery, once again, would be postponed for 6 weeks.

I knew. I knew in my heart on Monday that her surgery would be postponed. I was hoping otherwise.

Her reports from the orphanage state that she was a sickly, little girl with respiratory infections and gi issues. For the six months she has been with us, not once has she gotten sick. Not once.

I am discouraged. I am tired. I am worn from waiting. We waited 16 months to meet her, to bring her to our family. How much longer must we wait for her.....

I know this is just Satan knocking down walls trying to seep his way into our house, into our lives. We are in the midst of planning, talking about whether adopting again is in our future. What better way for him to try to wrangle his way in and destroy and crush those plans. He will not!

Satan may attack, but the Lord is mighty.

“Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil.”
Eph 6:11

turkey lurkey

This little sand-eating, turkey lurkey has her palate repair surgery this Thursday.

Would you mind praying for us, her doctor and  her medical team involved in her care?

**I will try to post an update Friday morning.

i keep trying

Last night I sat and watched Sophie during her snack time throw blueberries on the floor and smash them on her highchair. She didn't want them, or anything I attempted to give her.

She hasn't been eating this week. Or, the week before.

She has done a complete 360.
She went from screaming because she wasn't getting food fast enough to her liking to having no interest in food whatsoever.

Some say it is her "trauma" from the first 12 months of her life coming out.
Some say it is because she has realized that she won't go hungry anymore;
that she's realized she'll always have food available now.

I keep trying everyday for her to eat.
Some days she will take about 4 bites from the spoon, and then she's done.
Some days she will not take any bites from the spoon.

I blend her breakfast, lunch, and dinner into a smoothie.
Spaghetti, protein powder,  and milk smoothie anyone?
Would you like a spinach, safflower oil (to boost her calories), and oatmeal smoothie?
I think "Yuck, how is she going to drink this concoction down?"
But she does; she drinks it every single time.

She uses the OXO Tot Training Cup in pink, of course!

One day she'll eat with a spoon again, but until that time I'll continue filling her up with the only way I know how.

today i love....

:: this little drool-covered monkey!

It has not been the easiest (almost) 6 months, but the blessings far outweigh the struggles we have had.

5 months home

It's been five whole months since she's been placed in our arms.
Five. How is that even possible?

She is the happiest baby I have ever seen.
Except for when she's hungry or tired.
Of course, aren't we all a little cranky when we're hungry or tired?

She is loving her bath time again!

She is into EVERYTHING!
Especially toilet water (if the door doesn't get closed) and the cat litter. Yuck!
We've had numerous baths during the day because of these little nice surprises.

She is still only saying about 3 words.
However, she is getting more vocal/loud (if that makes any sense).

The doctor rescheduled her palate surgery to early May.
I was disappointed. I just want it to be done and over with, so we can move forward with her speech and eating struggles.

She still loves music!
She loves to be outside!

She doesn't love Amy, the chicken, coming up to her snatching bites of her apple. :)
She was screaming, screaming, screaming. We thought she had gotten hurt somehow.
She will go up behind the chickens and try to pet them or grab at them though!

She is a little stinker! And, we love her so very much!

four months home

It has been 4 months and 3 days since little sister was placed in our arms.

She is 16 months old now.

She continues to love, love music.
She'll shake her little body, mainly her top portion, and wave her arms to the songs she likes.

We've had some regression with her food anxiety in the past couple of weeks.
We're not sure why she's regressed,
but we have recognized a couple of things that tend to trigger her anxiety.
Her screaming ( I should say hollering.) over food still continues, but it was getting better before her regression.

She's also having some problems in taking baths, which has not presented itself before now.
She absolutely does not want her head covered in water,
which is a problem when she has food all in her hair.
We know she has fluid in her ears, and
are wondering if the fluid has increased to an uncomfortable level
for her when her ears/head is getting wet.
She has surgery at the end of this month to repair her palate, and to place a set of tubes in her ears.
Hopefully, this will help with her baths.

She has a vocabulary of about three words.
Mama, baba, and every so often, she'll say hi.

She has learned the sign for "more" and "drink",
although many times she will confuse the two.
Her signs aren't perfect, but she's at least doing them.

We were finally able to take her outside to play a little this week since its been warmer out.
She loved walking back and forth on the sidewalk.
She was a little hesitant walking in the grass, but she did it.

She's bonded extremely well with the family, and that is a blessing in itself.

chinese new year 2015

Chinese New Year is today.
The year of the wood sheep.
Our daughter's first Chinese New Year with our family.

Before we brought little sister home, I had grand plans of having a
Chinese New Year party every year.
It didn't happen this year.

Joe was gone out of town for work.
The second week in a row.
Lord, help me.
I was home with all five kids just trying to survive the week.

The day before the new year, I was bombarded with momma guilt.
Pictures of friends posting their little ones in their Chinese silks,
pictures of families making dumplings, pictures of Chinese New Year celebrations
were all over my facebook page and instagram account.
I begin finding myself with those horrible dark thoughts of not doing enough, not being enough.
I stepped away from social media for awhile.
I prayed, and battled with Satan to take a step back.

I didn't have the pantry stocked with noodles, or oranges, or chicken, etc.
I forgot to put it on the grocery list.
I was NOT going to take 5 kids to the store.
Don't get me wrong. I've taken them all out on my own several times.
More times than I can count on my fingers and toes combined.
I just was not prepared to take them all to the store that day.
Let me tell ya'~you have to gear yourself up for an adventure like that. :)

So, I decided that night we may not be celebrating with a big meal of Chinese cuisine,
but we can do some crafts.

We didn't end up doing crafts either. :)

We stayed home.
We celebrated and rejoiced that little sister had finally mastered the sign for "more".
Hallelujah!
We had a dinner of homemade biscuits and gravy, and sausage patties.
Joci wore her Chinese dress all day.
Sophie was in pajamas most of the day then wore her dress for some late night pictures.

I was snapping away not realizing I didn't have the memory card
in the camera when I took the pictures.
But it's okay. I may not post a picture this evening,
but when I find my usb cord I'll come back and upload a photo.

We didn't have a Chinese New Year party this year.
At the end of the day, it didn't matter.
Little sister is young enough that it doesn't matter to her.
The other kids were happy just to play with Legos, have a little break from school, and
play outside in the cold, windy weather.
Sophie was having a ball playing with an antique over-sized abacus
that I knew I was holding onto for some special reason.

Sometimes we need to be gentler on ourselves,
to not look at what we see is wrong,
but look at what is right in our lives.
To not see our mistakes or disappointments,
but to see our good.

To not see that I didn't prepare and plan a Chinese New Year party,
but to see that I made a favorite meal from scratch that the whole family enjoyed.
To not see that we didn't do special activities,
but to see that we enjoyed each other's company
(for most of the day-we did have a couple of fights, but not many).
To not see that I expect myself to be super-mom,
but to see that I am just me doing what I was meant to be and do.


Gong Xi Fa Cai
(Happy Chinese New Year)

~tonya

3 months later

 

{Yes, those are pine needles on the floor. Yes, we need to paint where the radiators were taken out.}



It has been 3 months and 2 days since little sister was placed in our arms.

Some days it seems like she's been with us forever.
Some days it seems like it was only yesterday that we picked her up.
Especially on those days where we struggle.

Yes, we struggle.
It's important for me to tell the truth about our adoption journey.
I don't want to sugar-coat it for any reason, and
I feel it's important so that prospective families hear some of the struggles others face.

Most of the time, she is the happiest baby I have ever seen.
She loves music.
Especially the chicken dance.

She loves to eat.
Loves to eat.
She can eat more than our five year old some days.

She loves baths.
She loves water.

She is a smart, little girl.
Yet, she doesn't speak much, whether that is due to her open palate or not, we're not sure.

She struggles with drinking correctly from a cup.
She makes this quirky, smacking movement as if she's chewing her milk or water.
She isn't quite getting the idea of how to "sip and swallow".

We struggle.
We struggle with teaching her how to "sip and swallow" even though we have special cups to accommodate her open palate, and have been taught how to use those special cups.
We struggle with her not speaking, because usually it ends up her screaming for something she wants.

I spend lots of time praying throughout the day for her, for me.
Prayers for patience, prayers for words or something to form other than screaming.

But we also rejoice......

We rejoiced when she touched and explored the needles of a Christmas tree for the first time!
We rejoiced when she decided she liked textured food over pureed food!
We rejoiced when she decided she will pick up food and feed herself!
We rejoiced when she took her first steps!
We rejoice when she's walking all over the place!
We rejoice when she wants to cuddle and be held!
We rejoice when she says mama intentionally!

This adoption thing is hard, really hard, but such a beautiful mess.
One day soon that beautiful mess will become one glorious mess!

deperate for food

It has been almost two months since we've had little sister home. During those days, I wanted to cry, scream, and kick my heels in during her mealtimes.

She would eat anything we gave her, if it was pureed or a texture she preferred (which is very little by the way).

She screamed in-between bites of food.
She screamed when she still had food in her mouth wanting another bite.
She screamed after eating a very full meal.

She acted as if she was afraid she wouldn’t get more when she was hungry again. 

Even if she wasn't hungry, anytime she saw food, she would fixate on it until we gave it to her or throw a fit if we didn't give it to her.
Even is she wasn't hungry, we had to hide her bottle, because if she saw it she would scream for it.
Even is she wasn't hungry, she still wanted food.

This food anxiety could be a lifelong process, as we're learning.

We are still trying to figure out how to handle this some days. 
We are trying to teach her that we are always going to feed her, but we are also trying to teach her not to throw a fit and cry when she wants something and that it is okay to wait more than 5 seconds between each bite.
We are trying to teach her to recognize those signs from her tummy that she's full.

We (her & I) still cry and scream some days during mealtimes, but not today.

Today was the first day that she didn't cry when she saw her bottle before she was fed her meal.

Progress made. Slowly, but it's still progress.

P.S.-Would please pray for us to overcome her food anxiety, and the challenges and struggles that are presented daily during her mealtimes?

yuexiu park and hong kong

{China day 13.......November 19th}

This was our last day in Guangzhou.
We had to stick around until 4 to wait for little girl's visa.
We decided to finally take a trip to a park that was "across the street" from our hotel.

The streets here are very busy and don’t have crosswalks or hordes of other pedestrians like in Beijing, so the citizens use the metro stations to go under the traffic rather than try to cross it.

To get to Yuexiu Park, we had to cross under two roads via metro stations (imagine underground walking tunnels), but we eventually found it! The park was huge. I'm guessing we didn't even see half of it. We expected what most of you are picturing when you hear the word park: large grassy areas, trees, lots of playground equipment...

This was not like that. Yuexiu Park was an extremely, well-manicured nature exhibit, with soothing music playing throughout, stone and tile sidewalks, man-made waterfalls, and lakes filled with paddle boats. {We should have visited earlier in the week, and then we could have possibly taken a paddle boat in the evening.}

Supposedly, there is a playground of sorts for children, and a statue of Five Rams, which is considered the symbol for the city. We did not see those. The bigs were tired of walking around, and ready to take a break.

There were several groups of people exercising (doing Tai Chi) in the park.

Here are a few pictures that I took.

Workers redoing a small area of the park....

Stairs leading to other sections of the park.

A metal sculpture on the other side of the lake.

Koi fish in a fountain.

 



 

 

After getting our required visa, we were able to leave to back home. We were all ready. We had been ready for several days. I was missing the little boys something fierce. I was ready to be in our home with our bed, belongings, and family.

 

We had scheduled a train from Guangzhou to Hong Kong that evening. The Palumbo's amazingly had the same train schedule, and first leg of our flight from Hong Kong to Newark.

 

We had to take a van ride from Guangzhou to the train station. We chose to travel from Hong Kong instead of Guangzhou, back to the states because it was $1500+ cheaper for us. Let me tell you~it was a bear though. Our van ride from Guangzhou to the train station was about 30 minutes long. We then had to haul our luggage up through 2 escalators, a customs check, and load them on the train. Because we are cheap and didn't want to pay $20 a suitcase to check them on the train.

 

The train ride was about 2 1/2 hours. It wasn't a bullet train. It was a regular, slow passenger train. When booking our itinerary, Joe and I wanted to ride the train because we would be able to see some of the countryside. What we failed to notice was that we would be traveling when it was dark out. We made it though. Found our guide, and took another van ride to the airport hotel.

 

Hong Kong was established as a colony of the British Empire in the 1800s. The British culture is still carried out in Hong Kong today. Vehicles were driven in the left lanes, drivers sat in the right seat, and English was a main language (several had British accents). Next time, we'll stay longer in Hong Kong and do some sightseeing.

 

 





~Tonya

consulate appointment

{China day 12.......November 18th}

Today we had our appointment at the US Consulate, which doesn’t allow electronic devices of any kind. So, no photos. We were allowed to take in a clear bag with our supplies. Imagine 4 passports, formula dispenser, a bottle, bib, a diaper, wipes, and a small toy shoved in a gallon Ziploc bag.

The building was fenced in, and access was only allowed by a guard at the gate checking passports. After we were allowed in the gate, we formed a line to go through a security checkpoint. Two lines were formed outside the building before the checkpoint. One line for adoptive families, which was moving very quickly, and another very, very long non-moving line for Chinese citizens waiting to gain a visa to the US. Several Chinese citizens were also standing outside the gates waiting for access from the guards.

We walked in with our daughter, and in a matter of two hours or less, she had her paperwork complete to obtain her visa to travel. We walked back out of the building, and the same people standing in the Chinese line were still there. Still standing. Still waiting.

All I can think about are those citizens going day after day waiting hours and hours to obtain a visa to the land of freedom. So heart-breaking.

~Tonya

guangzhou chimelong xiangjiang safari park

{China day 11......November 17th}

Today we went to the Chimelong Xiangjiang Safari Park.
We took a tram ride through part of the zoo to see the larger animals for about 45 minutes.
Then we went by foot for the rest of the day.

Dinosaur world~my two little boys would have loved this!

The dinosaurs were realistic-looking with sounds and other side effects, such as spitting water.

 

 

A panda just had a set of baby triplets this year.

One of the baby triplets

Another baby triplet

Joci was sad that we missed the 3rd baby. Apparently she was snuggled up to her momma.

 

It was a great zoo. One of the best we've seen!

 

We had a great day, but it would have been better if these two monkeys were here with us.

 

 

 ~Tonya



 

takin' it easy

{China day 10......November 16th}

Today was another free day for us.

We just stayed around the hotel.

The kids did a little swimming with new friends.

Then we rested up for our big adventure the next day to the Safari Zoo.

~Tonya

little sister

A few things about our Sophie girl:

~she loves to play pat-a-cake

~she loves playing with Joci {I think it's the high-pitched baby voice she uses.}

~often times, she prefers dad over mom

~she is an excellent sleeper as long as no one is holding her

~she loves music. She'll rock back & forth when she hears a song she likes. It's so adorable.

~she doesn't necessarily like to be in the baby carrier, but she'll tolerate it for a little while.

~she likes baby rattles, and toys that make noise

~she likes to drink her milk (formula). We have to hide the bottle because if she sees it, she'll want it.

~she has the chubbiest cheeks. We call them her chipmunk cheeks.

We have been immeasurably blessed, and are so lucky to have her join our family.

~Tonya

medical check

{China day 9.........November 15th}

Today Sophie had her medical check.
Basically, a very brief well-care visit similar to what you might receive in the states.

She has gained 1.5 kilos since her last update that we received.
That's equivalent to 3.3 lbs!!
The girl does like to eat!!

She has had a cough and runny nose the last few days.,
but no fever.
The doctor checked her out, and was concerned with what she was hearing in her lungs.
They diagnosed her with bronchitis, prescribed us some medication.
Joe paid for the prescription.
It was actually very, very cheap.
$9 USD for 2 prescriptions.
She took the medicine like a champ.
It is strawberry flavored, and smells very, very sweet.
Joe said, "Smells better than any American medicine the kids have taken."

Lots of waiting around today in a very warm room.
Once we were done with the checks, we were able to go wait outside where it was cooler.
We had 15 families to wait on since we were one of the first in the line.

Although it may seem there are numerous children for adoption,
the Chinese love their children, and are concerned about them.
Always talking to them, smiling at them, making sure they are warm, etc.

~Tonya